Love You, Potter
by Opal Koboi and Emerald eyes
Summary: Mostly a dialogue expressing a few points in Lily and James's relationship. LJ Canon. Rated for swearing.


**Love You, Potter**

There were many things in my life, which were going to remain mysteries forever.

Like, how did Black manage to convince McGonagall not to give him detention after he blew up a piece of chocolate cake in her face that time in fifth year?

And how could Dumbledore assign the most irresponsible, bullying git in the whole school to the most influential position a student could attain, while Peter Pettigrew was more suitable?

And, of course, how can a person be _that much_ full of himself?

Insults, humiliations, eye-rolls… No matter what I threw at that idiot, he just wouldn't back off. And his tactics were getting dirtier as the days went by, I could tell. He would try to manipulate me in every way possible.

* * *

"Hello, Lily"

"Goodbye, Potter"

"Hey, what's with the last name?"

"I don't call people I don't like by their first names and I think you should do the same whenever you decide to ruin my day by addressing me"

"So you don't like me?"

"Exactly"

"You're pretty cruel for an eleven-year-old"

"… Said James Potter, demonstrating perfect use of hypocrisy"

"You think I'm cruel?"

"Yes"

"Why?"

"You told Felicity Zordan right before the sorting that people whos last name starts with 'Z' have never gotten past the sorting"

"How was I supposed to know she'd take it seriously?"

"Maybe because she's muggle-born"

"Well, once Madam Pomfrey revived her, she was okay"

"That's not the point, it was mean and heartless and I don't want to talk about it right now or to you at all. Goodbye"

* * *

"Hello, Lily"

"Goodbye, Potter"

"Still don't like me, huh?"

"How perceptive of you"

"I suppose you never of giving people second chances"

"I did give you a second chance and you blew it"

"How?"

"You pushed Mellinda Beggins into the lake"

"It was all in good fun. How was I supposed to know she is afraid of The Giant Squid?"

"Let me think… hmmm… maybe it's because that Boggart you somehow got into her closet turned into The Giant Squid last week"

"Why do you think it was me?"

"Because you dropped little hints of it all through Herbology the next day"

"I did not"

"-_ 'For someone to pull a trick like that, he would have to be cool, suave, mischivieous' _–"

"Okay, maybe it was me, but it wasn't _that_ cruel -"

"Goodbye, Potter"

* * *

"Hello, Lily"

"Bye, Potter"

"Where did the 'good' go?"

"To Azkaban. It killed a bunny so it could get as far away from you as possible. I desperately wanted to join it, but the Dementors remind me of you, so it wouldn't do any good"

"How do they remind you of me?"

"Suck happiness out of everything… Posses deadly kisses…"

"You find my kisses deadly"

"Stop wiggling your eyebrows at me and I meant literally deadly. You know, bad breath…"

"I believe I just detected hostility"

"I wonder why… Besides, how would I have any clue about your kisses?"

"Well, I would be glad to demonstrate"

"I'd better go and inform the female population of Hogwarts that you hormones have been unleashed"

* * *

"Hello, Lily"

"Can't you take a hint, Potter?"

"What a unique form of welcoming… Then again, with you everything is different"

"Flattery will get you nowhere, Potter. Now go find Black for me"

"What does Sirius have that I don't?"

"Neat hair"

"Thank you for the compliment, Evans"

"No problem, Black"

"How come you're civil to Sirius, but not me?"

"It's because Sirius doesn't feel the need to pester me 24 hours a day"

"Are you sure about that, Evans? For all you know I could harbor a secret, passionate affection for you"

"Shove it, Black"

"My pleasure"

"You better not start affecting Black's behavior. One annoying premature idiot following me around is more than enough"

* * *

"Hello, Lily"

"Get lost, boy-genius"

"A compliment! Be still my heart!"

"Be careful, Potter. You're half an inch from death"

"Thanks for the warning, Love. AAAAAAARRRRRGHHHHH! GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!"

* * *

"Hello, Lily"

…

"You know, it's not nice to ignore people when they are talking to you"

…

"Or to set chickens at them"

…

"So, I guess you're not going to apologize"

…

"So, I will have to make do with solely being in your company and not being able to be graced with your enchanting charm and wit"

…

…

…

…

…

"Okay, this whole 'ignoring James' thing is getting weird. I have to get some sort of reaction from you, or else I'll begin to think I'm talking to a statue"

…

"It might cause some form of brain damage"

…

"And then I'll be shipped off to St. Mungo's"

…

"So, every source of excitement in your life will evaporate"

…

"And then furry elephants will do the tango on the moon"

…

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Even profanity sounds like a beautiful melody, coming from you. The sun cannot even begin to comprehend how you shine so bright while she can barely emit a brief spark in comparison"

"Cut the poetry, Potter. It doesn't suit you"

"So I should stick to you, since you suit me so well"

"Don't even try it, Potter"

* * *

"Hello, Lily"

"Bye, Potter"

"I'm going to live on the moon when I'm grown up"

"And to think you got the highest O.W.L transfiguration score…"

"I'm thrilled you noticed honey"

"Shove the honey"

"-Back into the tree"

"Make sure I'm around when you do that"

"So you can kiss me?"

"No, so I could witness the bees stinging you, cackling evily all the while"

"And then you'll kiss me? Lily? Lily, where are you going?"

* * *

"Hello, Lily"

"Bye, Potter"

"You know what? I don't think you like me very much"

"No kidding"

"Sarcasm suits you, darling"

"Shove it, Potter"

"Still with the last name thing?"

"No, it's just your imagination"

"Still don't like me, huh?"

"No, Potter. Nothing changed since first-year"

"Well, I would have to claim the opposite. That figure of yours for example-"

"I wouldn't finish that sentence if I were you"

"Why ever not, Beautiful?"

"Because if you don't, you will lose several significant organs, one of which most men value greatly"

"My stomach? Hey, wait a minute – I just called you 'beautiful'"

"I despise short attention spans…"

"No, I meant that I called you beautiful and you didn't snap at me for it"

"I was snapping at you for something else at the time, I couldn't stop in the middle of one snap and start another"

"You love me! I knew you did all along"

"Oh, really. So Sirius was lying when he asked me to give you a chance last week telling about your tearful breakdown"

"PADFOOT! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU!"

* * *

"Hello, Lily"

"Potter, stop using my first name"

"But I don't dislike you"

"Sure you don't"

"I love you with every fiber of my being. With every nail of my toes and fingers. With every sperm of my-"

"Okay, I get it!"

* * *

"Hello, Lily"

"Potter, I'm warning you"

"Isn't it a beautiful day, Lily?"

"Potter…"

"So you still don't like me?"

"Of course not"

"Good, I wouldn't want you to like me"

"You wouldn't?"

"No. I would want you to love me"

"Stuff it Potter"

"And sew eyes to it, then give it to a beautiful redhead with entrancing green eyes"

* * *

"Hello, Lily"

"What did I tell you?"

"That you won't call me by my first name unless you like me and that you want me to do the same"

"Exactly"

"So you don't like me?"

"After so many years, he finally gets it"

"So you want me to call you by your last name?"

"I would appreciate it"

"Okay. Love you, Potter"

"Now, that's more like it"

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**AN:**

What do you think?

I just felt like rambling… And having one story with 'Complete' written underneath... :-D

Please review, I need to know if it's good or not. Or I'll just get rid of it, since it's just taking up my computer's memory.


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